Jokes of the day,share your jokes here.no dirty jokes:) |
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donnieyen
Member
Cash: $ 2.60
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Joined: 08 Jan 2009
Location: us |
Jokes of the day,share your jokes here.no dirty jokes:) |
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I think that I'm a chicken
Panda Psychiatrist: What's your problem?
Patient: I think I'm a chicken.
Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on?
Patient: Ever since I was an egg!
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Mon Feb 09, 2009 5:37 am |
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LottomagicZ4941
Senior Member
Cash: $ 1.66
Posts: 2633
Joined: 02 Dec 2004
Location: Earth |
LOL I'll be re-e-telling
quote: Originally posted by donnieyen I think that I'm a chicken
Panda Psychiatrist: What's your problem?
Patient: I think I'm a chicken.
Psychiatrist: How long has this been going on?
Patient: Ever since I was an egg!
How come the chicken couldn't win the lotto?
Cuz he was to chicken to buy a ticket.
How come the lotto playing chicken crossed the road?
To buy a lotto ticket.
Perhaps I should be telling blond jokes instead of chicken jokes.
How come the blond wouldn't use a splash page?
S/he was afraid she would get her computer wet.
How come the golden goose joined a lotto club?
She got to old to lay the golden eggs.
Did you hear about the Amway distributor that won the lotto?
S/he spent it all trying to build a downline.
How come the MLM chicken crossed the road?
She hear there was a downline on the other side.
Non promotional Facebook Jail regular forum inquiry
Promotional post in advert section for new Facebook group for those building a downline
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Mon Feb 09, 2009 2:27 pm |
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bhanvid
Member
Cash: $ 3.85
Posts: 19
Joined: 07 Apr 2009
Location: usa |
lol! cool chiken.,
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Mon May 11, 2009 8:37 am |
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billrainier
Contributing Member
Cash: $ 8.65
Posts: 42
Joined: 11 Apr 2009
Location: Seattle, Washington |
The Less You Know, The More You Make
"Salary Theorem" states that "Engineers and Scientists can never earn as much as Business Executives and Sales People."
This theorem can now be supported by a mathematical equation based on the following two postulates:
1. Knowledge is Power.
2. Time is Money.
As every engineer knows:
Power = Work / Time
Since:
Knowledge = Power
Time = Money
It follows that:
Knowledge = Work/Money.
Solving for Money, we get:
Money = Work / Knowledge.
Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of work done.
Conclusion:
The less you know,the more you make.
http://www.coolfunnyjokes.com/Funny-Jokes/Computer-Jokes/The-Less-You-Know,-The-More-You-Make.html
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Tue May 12, 2009 2:44 am |
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LottomagicZ4941
Senior Member
Cash: $ 1.66
Posts: 2633
Joined: 02 Dec 2004
Location: Earth |
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quote: Originally posted by billrainier The Less You Know, The More You Make
"Salary Theorem" states that "Engineers and Scientists can never earn as much as Business Executives and Sales People."
This theorem can now be supported by a mathematical equation based on the following two postulates:
1. Knowledge is Power.
2. Time is Money.
As every engineer knows:
Power = Work / Time
Since:
Knowledge = Power
Time = Money
It follows that:
Knowledge = Work/Money.
Solving for Money, we get:
Money = Work / Knowledge.
Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of work done.
Conclusion:
The less you know,the more you make.
http://www.coolfunnyjokes.com/Funny-Jokes/Computer-Jokes/The-Less-You-Know,-The-More-You-Make.html
''
From the same website you got that one from
"Money Talks!
During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer:
"Look, I'll give you $100 if you'll change the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I'm supposed to promise to 'love, honor and obey' and 'be faithful to her forever,' I'd appreciate it if you'd just leave that out."
He passed the minister a $100 bill and walked away satisfied.
On the day of the wedding, when it came time for the groom's vows, the pastor looked the young man in the eye and said: "Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life, and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?"
The groom gulped and looked around, and said in a tiny voice, "Yes," then leaned toward the pastor and hissed: "I thought we had a deal."
The pastor put a $100 bill into the groom's hand and whispered: "She made me a better offer."
"
Non promotional Facebook Jail regular forum inquiry
Promotional post in advert section for new Facebook group for those building a downline
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Thu Aug 27, 2009 12:15 am |
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Sime
Senior Member
Cash: $ 86.60
Posts: 445
Joined: 19 Mar 2009
Location: United Kingdom |
Two hedgehogs trying to cross the road.
First hedgehog says, "Look it's easy. Watch me. You just sit between the wheels."
The first hedgehog then walks to the middle of the road and stops. A car then drives straight over missing him. The hedgehog then continues to the other side.
"See," he says, "Now it's your turn."
The second hedgehog then takes a deep breath and walks out to the middle of the road. He stops and waits.
Suddenly... Thump! Squish! Splatter!
The first hedgehog looks in shock, opens his mouth slowly and says, "Aww shit. I forgot about robin reliants."
Not all countries can afford... a lavish monarchy.
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Fri Aug 28, 2009 6:04 pm |
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moneymakinmom
Contributing Member
Cash: $ 1.35
Posts: 36
Joined: 18 Aug 2009
Location: Camp Hill, PA |
quote: Originally posted by billrainier The Less You Know, The More You Make
"Salary Theorem" states that "Engineers and Scientists can never earn as much as Business Executives and Sales People."
This theorem can now be supported by a mathematical equation based on the following two postulates:
1. Knowledge is Power.
2. Time is Money.
As every engineer knows:
Power = Work / Time
Since:
Knowledge = Power
Time = Money
It follows that:
Knowledge = Work/Money.
Solving for Money, we get:
Money = Work / Knowledge.
Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of work done.
Conclusion:
The less you know,the more you make.
http://www.coolfunnyjokes.com/Funny-Jokes/Computer-Jokes/The-Less-You-Know,-The-More-You-Make.html
Wow, this one had me laughing out loud, literally!
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Sat Aug 29, 2009 4:04 am |
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moneymakinmom
Contributing Member
Cash: $ 1.35
Posts: 36
Joined: 18 Aug 2009
Location: Camp Hill, PA |
Two Rednecks are hunting.
One of them accidentally shoots himself.
His friend yanks out his cell phone and dials 911.
"What is your emergency?"
[Panicking]"My friend just shot himself... I think he might be dead."
"Calm down, first... I need you to make sure he's dead."
[With a deep breath] Okay, hold on.
[gunshot in the background]
[Calmly] Okay, he's definitely dead, now what?
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Sat Aug 29, 2009 4:10 am |
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LottomagicZ4941
Senior Member
Cash: $ 1.66
Posts: 2633
Joined: 02 Dec 2004
Location: Earth |
quote: Originally posted by moneymakinmom Two Rednecks are hunting.
One of them accidentally shoots himself.
His friend yanks out his cell phone and dials 911.
"What is your emergency?"
[Panicking]"My friend just shot himself... I think he might be dead."
"Calm down, first... I need you to make sure he's dead."
[With a deep breath] Okay, hold on.
[gunshot in the background]
[Calmly] Okay, he's definitely dead, now what?
Half to admit that is better then my redneck jokes but here they are anyway.
YOu may be a redneck if you think SEO stands for SearchEveryOne.
How come no one liked the redneck that won the lotto?
Cuz s/he was still a redneck.
Non promotional Facebook Jail regular forum inquiry
Promotional post in advert section for new Facebook group for those building a downline
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Sun Aug 30, 2009 6:44 pm |
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moneymakinmom
Contributing Member
Cash: $ 1.35
Posts: 36
Joined: 18 Aug 2009
Location: Camp Hill, PA |
Those aren't so bad. Pretty funny!
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Mon Aug 31, 2009 12:31 am |
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Sime
Senior Member
Cash: $ 86.60
Posts: 445
Joined: 19 Mar 2009
Location: United Kingdom |
Went to a restaurant to have duck the other night. Delicious but ended up walking home with a bill.
Not all countries can afford... a lavish monarchy.
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Mon Sep 07, 2009 11:21 pm |
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cashbags
New Member
Cash: $ 0.85
Posts: 4
Joined: 10 Sep 2009
Location: Bristol |
Council Workers.................... |
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A guy goes to the Local Council to apply for a job.
The interviewer asks him, 'Are you allergic to anything?'
He answers 'Yes - caffeine'
'Have you ever been in the services?'
'Yes,' he says. 'I was in Iraq for two years.'
The interviewer says, 'That will give you 5 extra points toward employment,' and then asks, 'Are you disabled in any way?
The guy says, 'Yes ....a bomb exploded near me and blew my testicles off.'
The interviewer tells the guy, 'O.K. In that case, I can hire you right now.
Normal hours are from 8 AM to 2 PM.
You can start tomorrow at 10:00 - and plan on starting at 10 AM every day.'
The guy is puzzled and says, 'If the hours are from 8 AM to 2 PM, why don't you want me to be here before 10 AM?' '
'This is a council job,' the interviewer says.
'For the first two hours we just stand around drinking coffee and scratching our b*ll*cks, not really any point in you coming in for that.'
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Thu Sep 10, 2009 5:18 pm |
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louissusman
Member
Cash: $ 2.40
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Joined: 12 Sep 2009
Location: USA |
if u laugh lovers then try this site and keep laughing.
www.jokes.com
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Sat Sep 12, 2009 2:42 pm |
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mikem86
Member
Cash: $ 1.55
Posts: 22
Joined: 23 Oct 2009
Location: PA |
I love jokes.com! haha
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Fri Oct 23, 2009 11:35 pm |
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